I know I am taking a risk with what I am about to write but I mean it in no disrespectful way. I am writing it to make a point not down anyone or disrespect anyone.
If you have watched any tv lately you surely have seen the commercials welcoming back Robin Roberts to Good Morning America. They are heartwarming to say the least. Her journey has been a long one and she has been through a lot the past few years. I wish her nothing but wellness and goodness. I really do! But at the risk of sounding like a cold hearted person the more I have watched the commercials welcoming her back and the more I thought about them I have to admit I became a little upset over them. I got to thinking about all the non-celebrities who have fought the fight. The people I know. The Margie's, The Pat's, The Jamie's, The Michelle's, The Chris's, The Rod's just to name a few. There are many others. The people who fight and have fought without the spotlight on them. The fight they fought to the cure without having a big welcome back celebration. To me those are the heroes I know. They have suffered much and do not kid yourself, they still suffer every single day. Wondering will it come back. I have to believe it is their own hell they do not talk about with too many people. Daily hearing the voice in their head flooding them with thoughts of, "Is the cancer coming back today?" I am sure it is a horrible hell to hear that voice everyday ringing in their ears. These are the heroes of my life the fighters. The people of the world who are not in the spotlight who get no recognition for what they have been through.
Then I got to thinking about the people who had the scare. You know the ones. They get a call saying a test was positive or something didn't look right, only to find out they really didn't have cancer. Ahh the turmoil waiting for an answer. Then it comes, it is nothing and all is fine. What a relief all the while they live in their hell until that answer comes. I am sure it is like this for the people who did have to have treatments. The last day of treatment. It is done but we still have to wait five years to be in the clear. Seriously? Where is the celebration for these people? There are many winners out there who deserve the welcome back celebration/party!
Like I said I am not bashing Robin at all. She is a courageous woman but I hope people realize she is not the only courageous person out there. Just because she has the support of millions we must remember there are many people who have little support. In the real world many people lose support because many of their family and friends cannot handle illness. It scares them when a friend or family member gets cancer because it forces them to look at their own death and many people don't want to believe they are going to die too. It is a sad fact but the bail on the people they should support. I hope in reading this you can be a friend to someone who is suffering with illness and not sit on the sidelines expecting everyone to be there for the person suffering, many won't be, believe me. When a person is ill they are still the same person. Cancer or no cancer. They still need you, your love, your caring, your well wishes, your sense of humor, and on and on. Don't make a person become their disease. They are not cancer they are the same person with just a little glitch that hopefully will pass. Maybe not fast, like you want, but over time it will. Like Robin they need your support. They need your party/celebration when it is all said and done but they also need you to remember they are still living in fear long after all the treatments are done and they seem fine to you. Remember, you have no idea what it is like to be ill until you yourself experience it so take the time to just be there for someone.
The story for me and many who suffer with chronic illness is the same. We don't want you to cure us we just want you to care. We don't want to hear your treatments that you think we should try. Unless your are a doctor keep your mouth shut. Treat us the way you always have. Don't give us advice. Make us laugh. Show us that we are still the same person to you that we were before our illness. Most likely we will never have the celebration day of the last treatment because chronic illness doesn't work that way. All the more reason we need you to cheer us on even when you feel awkward when we are around. We know how people feel about us, after time you begin to know what people think of you just by looking in their eyes. To many you do become the disease, damaged goods, and they feel uncomfortable around you. To others you are still the same. These people ask how you are but don't try to make you better. You know by the look in their eyes they really care. You try to explain things to them knowing they will never get it but they listen just the same. They don't get it but they care. This is enough for the chronically ill person. These are the people whom you receive your celebration from. They cheer you on knowing you suffer. They care. My hope is you can be this to someone you know!
So here's to you Robin in your return but most importantly here's to you all who suffer or have suffered and continue to suffer, maybe in your own head but you still suffer none the less. You are the one's who deserve the celebration just as much as Robin does! You are a hero! You are my hero and my inspiration! Thank you for that!
God Bless!
Dianne
Bravo Dianne!
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