Yup, there it is. I may have actually saw it a few days ago but I couldn't get it out of my head so I went back to the site to find it and save it. People work hard out there,believe me I know, I live with one of them. I have written about Rich's unending commitment to me and our life together. His love that in a way forces him to work harder than most. His love for me that doesn't allow him much time to himself. His love that forces him to work so many hours, many more than most, because I am unable to. Today I am glad there is a labor day, for Rich, and for all of you out there who work your arses off each and everyday to survive and pay the bills to have a comfortable life. What else do we really need besides a comfortable life where the bills are paid, food is on the table, and a roof over our head?Next I thought about selling the house. Why no one wants to buy it. As I have said before we have it well, well, but simple. I realize that more and more each time someone comes through the house. It is a relatively small house only around 1200 square feet, 1800 if you include the finished basement. You cannot imagine how many times we have heard from lookers it is too small. Too small? Really? We raised a family here with three children and it seemed fine to us. We were always, almost always, close together, and isn't that what really matters over square footage? Then there is the point that it isn't updated. I know we don't have granite, how dare us. We don't have new fancy cupboards, how dare us. I could go on but I will spare you. It gets annoying. It makes me wonder if all the people who complained about having to work so much had smaller places and not such fancy junk maybe they wouldn't have to work so much to have it all? I know this isn't true for everyone but from my point of the view it looks so much differently. Our next house? It will be even simpler than this one. We don't care!
Next, I think of the job thing once again pondering this labor day and over the fact that I can't work right now. Pondering over the fact that I want to work and I would love a labor day, a day off. Chronic illness is not forgiving enough to give you a day off. I remember when I use to work in the beauty shop and I looked forward to and enjoyed a day off now and then. I wish I could have that feeling back now, a day off from chronic illness hell would be marvelous! In all honesty it has been so long since I have had a day off from this hell that I don't even know what I would do with a whole day free of pain, muscle weakness, fatigue, etc. I can hardly even imagine what I would do. I feel like it is a far off land I will never see again. How crazy does that sound? Pretty crazy I am sure. Then I read the above: I fight for my health everyday in ways most people don't understand. I'm not lazy. I'M A WARRIOR. When I think back to the un-welcomed comments I use to get when I worked only one day or when I stopped working many years ago. The 'you don't understand what it is like' or 'you don't get the real world because you don't work' it annoys the heck out of me. The way I would stand there and let people talk down to me because I choose to stay home and not work. The sacrifices we made as a family, our kids as well. No big trips, no fancy cloths, our tiny house, as people remind us now as we try to sell. You know what? I won't write what I want to write but it has to do with my backside. I/We wouldn't trade any of it for anything and I am almost certain our children wouldn't either. Now, no kids home and I still don't work. I would love to hear what is being said behind my back now, what could she possibly do all day? Blah, blah, blah. Well, the haters can all kiss it too because being ill is the worst kind of full time job a person should ever have to work. The pay is lousy and the benefits suck! That being said, I WILL NEVER STOP BEING A WARRIOR. I will fight it to the end hanging by a thread on many days but still hanging on to that thread of hope. Today is Labor Day and I will enjoy it to my fullest and if not I will have my safety net next to me to catch me when I fall, Rich. Yes, still on his day off he works taking care of me but I know he will still enjoy the day right along with me!
Here's to Labor Day, ENJOY!
God Bless!
Dianne
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