Wednesday, June 12, 2013
What Children Do For You
Ahhhh, children. What would life be without them. Or should I write what would my life be without them as some people choose not to have them. It was never ever a question for me if I was going to have children it was only the answer of when. Rich and I both talked of having children way before we even were married. It was something we both wanted and agreed upon having as soon as we were married. No surprise to us, but maybe to many others, that our Katie was born nine months and four days after we said our I Do's. We were over joyed when she was born. Young and still very wet behind the years we took her home from the hospital flying blind as most first time parents do. Back then it wasn't like it is these days where the grandparents help you out when you have a baby. You were on your own. Katie was one of those backwards babies you know the ones who sleep all day and are up all night? It took a few weeks to change her clock but finally it worked. After the two weeks she would go to bed at seven pm and wake up at seven am, never waking up once during the night. Seriously? Who has a baby that sleeps all night like that at such a young age? Once we were use to Katie and had a schedule figured out we knew we wanted another one soon. When Katie was a little over a year we started trying again. Much to our surprise nothing happened for quite a few months. I was getting worried we were never going to have another child but Rich kept reassuring me when it was time it would happen, he was right. Twenty three months after Katie's birth Stephanie came into our lives. Easiest pregnancy and birth ever recorded in history. She was a dream come true. Two weeks early and she slept all the time. Well, at least for the first two weeks, then came the baby from, dare I say it, hell. Colic, crabby, and wanted to be held all the time and I mean all the time. It was rough because Katie had to have suffered since Steph required so much attention. After two years of this Steph finally got better. Yes, she woke up at night for two years straight and was not happy but I could at least start to put her down when she was a year old without her wailing like we were beating her. When she turned two things got even better except she was a total hot/bullheaded child. Our challenge child. The one everybody talks about when they say they had the one child that was the hard one. We decided at this time we wanted to try one for time. Crazy fools, maybe, but we knew we wanted more. We really wanted to have a boy but we would have been happy with another girl. I became pregnant with Richie fast like the first try. We were very happy! Things were going okay until about the middle of the pregnancy. It was a rough one to say the least but finally once again in May we had our son. It was a horrible delivery. Things didn't go as they did for the first two but Richie entered the world none the less and Rich was so happy to have a son as was I. Taking Richie home was a joy he was the best baby a parent could ever ask for. He did everything the way you would hope a baby would. He was the perfect baby I don't know what else to say. I think maybe it was because the pregnancy and birth were so bad he knew he had to be good. Plus he loved his sisters and would sit and watch them for hours. We wanted and talked about having another one but since the pregnancy and birth of Richie we decided it was best to stop at three. I still wonder about having another one. If it would have been a boy or girl. Where he or she would have been in life now. It wasn't meant to be so we moved on raising our three gifts from God.
I loved raising my children. Yes there were those times I pulled my hair out of my head but all in all I was blessed to have good kids. I know they did many things behind my back, they were human, but I ran a pretty tight ship so they had to do them behind my back because for some reason I always called them out. I really did have eyes in the back of my head and to this day they can't lie to me. They knew when I meant business I meant business and don't piss me off! haha Many times I recall when I would be so mad and Richie would laugh at me because I was so mad. With the exception of the time I chased him with a wooden spoon I know he didn't laugh then but it sure does leave for some good stories and gives him something to hold against me, at least he has one thing. Then there was the time Katie didn't get off the school bus. Being the mother I was I was in a panic I grabbed the phone instantly and yes I tracked her down and went to the house she was at and practically dragged her out of the house by her hair. The drive home was something only her and I know about and neither one of us want anyone else to know what was said in that car. haha! Like we always say, "It wasn't pretty." I can't remember many bad times with Steph she was a pretty good kid. I think because she was so hard before she started school she was better as she got older. I was so worn from her younger years I was given better days with her as she aged. She was the child that the bus driver had to pry off my neck when she started school Kicking and screaming. This went on for the first year of school. You want to talk about killing a mother that'll do it for sure. I was always happy when I would hear from the bus driver or her teacher she was fine once she got there. Ah kids!
Looking back it all seems like a flash. There are so many things to write that I could be on here all day. The best part of having children is watching them grow into the adults you tried so very hard to teach them to be. The worst part of having children is one day they leave you. Yes, it was your goal and yes it is a great heart warmer knowing you helped mold them into productive adults who are able to function in society but the part of being a mom and letting go its brutal, especially when being mom all you know. You watch them spread there wings and you are so very happy for them all the while a piece of your heart is dying because you are no longer the main person in their lives. Helping them decide on their lives. You miss them and watch them on the sidelines do it all alone and with their significant other. You try not to think of how fast the time flew by and try to remember all the good that was in the time you had them under your roof. You take joy and pride in who they have become and sort of pat yourself on the back knowing you were a part of them becoming who they are. I am blessed to be able to watch all three of my children living good lives in good relationships with spouses they love. It feels good and for now, that is enough.