Friday, April 18, 2014
Funny how I always seem to read something that goes along with what my head was wrestling with the night before as I lay in bed. I have a love hate relationship with my middle of the night conversations that carry on in my head as trying to get back to sleep. There are times they can get so out of control I just have to get up and write them down or take a breather to bring myself back to some sort of relaxation point where I am able to slow it all down and go back to sleep. Easier said then done as an active brain can be torture at times but on the other hand can also help you in so many ways to try and figure all of life out. The past few weeks haven't helped much. We all know how it is when life hits you hard and you begin to think even more and ask all the why questions that you really shouldn't ask at all. So why do we do that? Ask all the questions? To make sense of certain things that happen to us that more than likely will never make any sense at all? I don't know. My ongoing struggle.
Today's early morning brain conversation began when I started thinking about someone who is thinking of looking for a new job. The uncertainty and the scariness of it all for this person. The rejection trying to find a new job might bring our way. It's funny how when we become comfortable we want to stay there but are we suppose to? I wondered. Wondered about the failure part of life. In jobs. In the world. With ourselves which might be the worst one of all. In our relationships. In our lives failure is there everyday. We can't hide from it and act like it doesn't exist because if we do we will never grow. If we don't step out of our comfort zone and reach for more why are we here? It isn't about a job or making more money it is about us. It is about getting to that place where we can tell ourselves I have done the best I can and now I will see what happens. If I don't get this job or someone doesn't like me that's okay because there is always tomorrow to try again. Life is funny like that because you always get a second chance no matter what your failures might be.
Relationships and friendships are proof. If you look back over your life you can see this first hand. You have had many different relationships over the years. Friends that came and went but they were there for a reason not as failure relationships but as relationship lessons. Your heart still holds a special place for many of those friends but life changed the circumstances of those friendships and you, or they, moved on. Is it a bad thing? Not at all. We must get to a place where we can just be okay with it all. We have all made stupid mistakes but we learned from them even in relationships. Embrace them they were there for a reason.
Ever since I have been ill I am able to look outside the box of life, as I would call it. I live it in a different light now so it is so easy for me to look out on others lives and see the hurt and how scared people really are especially of failure or maybe of life itself. We have to learn to cut that loose and give the world what it deserves, a piece of ourselves. We must quit being afraid of failure and look upon it as opportunity. Opportunity to give, opportunity to grow. You might try to do something and it doesn't work out but at least you tried. Your failure is just the next better opportunity waiting for you to find it. It seems life knows what we need before we know. We wait. We do the best we can with what we have and we must stop worrying about failing and being so hard on ourselves. It is sad our world has made us believe that if we are not #1 we are nothing. It isn't true we just have to start believing it so we can move on with our own dreams. Take the first step and believe in yourself even if the world doesn't. Let them eat you alive and come back even stronger than before.You can do it because failure is never real anyways!