When bad things happen to good people is a phrase that runs through my head everyday of the week. I use to say it even before my mother bought me the book with the same title. The book is written by A Rabbi, Harold S. Kushner. His son Aaron was born with progeria a disease where a child's body ages much faster than the years they have lived. His son died at the young age of fourteen. The death of his son, whom he adored, brought him to write the book. He wrote this book not only to help himself deal with his loss and the of question of why do bad things happen to good people, but to help others who struggle with the same question. I highly recomment this book to anyone who struggles with any ongoing tragedy, illness, or other continuing conditons that they are unable to make any sense out of. For all of us who are Christians the author is very truthful about matters about God. How we feel betrayed. How could God let this happen? His insights are very helpful and encouraging. I will say no more as I hope you will purchase this book for yourself. The last time I bought one for a friend it was only $10.00 at Family Christian Book Store or Barnes and Noble. One of the two place, of course I can't remember. I hope it helps you as much as it has helped me.
I am reading it once again, as I do once in a while to slap me upside the head when I don't understand life. One thing I do with books that I really like is underline all the parts that help me so when I am having a bad day I can refer back to a paragraph and meditate on it for a while, this is the perfect book for that! Right now I don't understand many things. I truly have finally come to somewhat a realization that my illness is here to stay and I am ok with that on most days, not that I understand it but I am friends with it now instead of fighting with it all the time. This makes each day so much easier.
As I look around me and see and hear stories of people I care about suffering it rips my heart out and takes me back to the place of when I was very ill five years ago. I can feel what these people are suffering through. I want to help them get to where I am but that would be impossible. I have found over the years the struggle was all mine, just as their struggle is all theirs to sort out. Time, that is all it takes, time! I hear or see people write the stupidest things to people who are struggling like, stay strong, or don't cry, or it will get better, on and on. Obviously these people have never had a major crisis hit them because if you have you would never say or write those things to people. Sometimes we just need to get to the breaking point and let lose. There is nothing wrong with that it is what gets us to a place of understanding, this can take years.
Truthfully from the Dianne point of view? Sometimes people really just need to SHUT UP!!! Silence really can be golden.
So as I watch people suffer, the person I am in love with, other people I love, people I know well, people I do not know well, I do know one thing. God is there even when it seems he isn't. Even when you want to scream and yell at him, why would you allow this to happen to me/us? Sometimes it is easier not to blame anyone and realize that in this world of sin there is pain and suffering and we just don't know why. But also to understand that through it all even when it doesn't seem like God is by your side and you are struggling alone, he really is there carrying you the whole time you just forgot to feel him and that's okay! The best part is he won't leave. When you are ready to come back he will be there with open arms waiting for your return. Until then, you go through whatever you need to go through, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Then one day you really will start to see the good in the world once again and realize everything does happen for a reason. God will be there right with you on that long, lonely journey that only you can take.
Blessings to all of you!